To ask a Sim to move in during The Sims 3, build your relationship with them to Friend or better, keep the conversation going with friendly socials, then click them and choose Ask to Move In from the Friendly menu. If they accept, they join your household; no romance or marriage is needed. Below we cover how to unlock the option, who moves along with them, what blocks it, and the Edit Town and cheat alternatives.
Step 1: Reach Friend Status
Ask to Move In only appears between Sims who have a relationship of Friend or higher, per the community wiki. Use friendly socials such as chatting, telling jokes, complimenting and sharing interests until the relationship label changes to Friend. Good Friends or Best Friends work even better.
A romantic relationship qualifies too. Couples, partners and fiances can all be asked; our girlfriend and boyfriend guide covers getting to that stage. Married Sims move in automatically, as our marriage guide explains.
Keep both Sims in a decent mood and avoid mean interactions right before you ask, so the conversation is on a good footing.
Step 2: Ask the Question
- With your Sim selected, keep chatting with the target until the conversation is going well. The community wiki suggests continuing friendly socials until the game shows a notification that the other Sim thinks yours is being friendly.
- Click the target Sim and open Friendly.
- Choose Ask to Move In.
- If they accept, they become part of your household and head to your home. Player reports say they may bring some money from their old household with them.
The Sim moves into your household, not the other way around. If you want your Sim to live in the other house instead, make that household the active one and have its Sim do the asking, or merge the households in Edit Town as described below.
What Blocks Ask to Move In
- Household size. A Sims 3 household holds up to 8 Sims. With The Sims 3 Pets, the community wiki reports a combined cap of 10 members, with no more than 8 Sims and 6 pets. The option disappears or fails when there is not enough room for everyone who has to come.
- Children come too. If the target is a single parent, the community wiki says their children must move in with them. A single mother with three kids needs four free slots.
- Children cannot be asked. Only older Sims can be invited this way.
- Commitment Issues. Per the community wiki, Sims with the Commitment Issues trait take longer before they will agree.
- Roommates. With University Life, a Sim who is currently a roommate cannot be asked. Dismiss them as a roommate first.
- Relationship too low. Plain Acquaintances will not see the option at all.
Alternatives: Edit Town and Cheats
Edit Town. From Edit Town you can move households and merge them without any social requirements. It is the tidy way to combine two playable households, and it lets you decide which house everyone ends up in.
Testing cheats. Open the console with Ctrl + Shift + C on Windows, type testingcheatsenabled true, then Shift-click the Sim you want and choose the option to add them to the active household. The community wiki’s cheat list describes this as a base-game Shift-click option; the wiki’s move-in guide ties it to Late Night, so if you do not see it, the pack may be the reason. The same guide notes that with testing cheats on you can also drag the relationship bar to full, then ask normally. Our Sims 3 cheats guide covers the console.
Cheats skip the story, but they are handy for fixing a household after a bug or for setting up a new save.
Frequently Asked Questions
Do I have to be dating someone to ask them to move in? No. Friends can move in together. Romance is optional.
Why is Ask to Move In greyed out or missing? Usually the household is full, the target has children who would push you over the limit, or the relationship is below Friend. Roommates also cannot be asked.
Can I choose which house we live in? Not with the interaction; the target moves into the asking Sim’s home. Use Edit Town to pick a different house.
Can a pet be asked to move in? Pets are adopted rather than invited. See our stray adoption guide.
Is this different in The Sims 4? Yes. The Sims 4 shows a screen where you choose who moves where. See our Sims 4 move-in guide. More Sims 3 guides are on the Sims hub.